Okay, so I didn’t actually write down 124 things you shouldn’t say, but I did write down a lot. Of course, there are more than 124 things…I’ve just selected some to share with you. Can you imagine reading 124 things? That’s a long-ass list! You’d be asleep half way through.
I spared you, be thankful. Now heed my advice and never utter the following words/phrases:
When are you due?
Your birthmark looks like an alligator.
Are you going to finish that ice cream?
Can’t (had to throw a motivational one in there)
Oh my god. Is that your mom?
Your dog just told me THEE funniest joke.
This Twinkie’s out of date. I’m going to throw it out.
When do you turn 18?
Would you even fit through there?
Where’s the bathroom. Oh, nevermind.
When are you guys planning to break up?
There was a guy on cops who looked just like you!
Did the aliens ask you about American Idol too?
My friend and I have a bet going–are you a chick or a dude?
I never want to hear you utter these words/phrases. Ever. Have some to add? Throw them in the comments.