10 Important Life Lessons

From the desk (well, bed. I write my blogs in my bed) of Megan Horn: 10 important life lessons.

1. Crocs will never be cool, no matter how “comfortable” they are.

2. If you act like you’re better than everyone else, be better than everyone else.

3. If you take lunch to work in Tupperware, the following will happen:

a) You’ll get it home safely 3.7 percent of the time.
b) You’ll leave it at work over the weekend and stink up the office 14.6 percent of the time.
c)  You’ll forget it in your car. Two months later you’ll be trying to figure out what that smell is 39.2 percent of the time.
d) You’ll leave it at work, it’ll rot for 3 months in the fridge and the poor office manager will have to burn it 42.5 percent of the time.

3.5. Don’t Google Image “Nasty Tupperware” for images for your blog. Just don’t.

4. Kids don’t care about your job. They care about whether or not you have candy.

5. You will get stopped at every red light if you’re in a hurry.

6. The scent of a post-winter Ugg boot can kill.

7. Butter both sides of the toast. Then if you drop it, it’ll fall butter side up.

8. You can buy literally anything on the internet. Uranium, whatever the hell this isJL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank (shipping is probably a bitch), a 2003 nickel for $1.00 and more. (If you find any other good ones, post them in the comments.)

9. You will always have just enough time to get done what you need to get done. No more, no less.

10. Shaving your legs in winter is pointless. It grows back as soon as you step out of the shower.

Have some to add? E-mail me or put them in the comments.


One thought on “10 Important Life Lessons

  1. Lynnae says:

    I was glancing through some of the links on this one and had to point out that the product features on your 2003 nickle for $1.00 says “Actual year may vary” which I found especially funny.

    I am suprised that you left out the numerous ebay auctions that can be found selling weird things.

    Although since those are usually gone within 6 days I understand.

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